I'll Be There
by Zed-sama
Summary: Set after the tv series ends, when Kai clearly has issues. Rei musings. Very little Yaoi. Awful summery.


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Warnings: One Shot. Conjecture abounds. Unrequited love. Yaoi, but only a very small tad. Some reference to mature issues ( nothing explicit ). Reviews are appreciated. Constructive criticism will be thought about. Flames will be laughed at. Have a nice day ^_^

I'll Be There

Kai Hiwatari is not who he appears. He's a world class beyblader, captain of a champion team and a teenager who is in total control. 

Appearances can be deceiving. 

Since the World Tournament, he's had to face a lot of issues. Confronting the past is never easy – I know – and Kai's is dark and tragic. 

His grandfather, Voltaire, and Boris were imprisoned indefinitely and the Russian abbey closed down, thanks mostly to Kai's testimony at the trial. He stood proudly before the judge and jury, facing the examiner unflinchingly, answering the questions in an unwavering voice, even when he was forced to speak on sensitive and sometimes humiliating subjects. 

When his questioning period was over, he sat with us with an unreadable expression on his face. It remained that way for the duration of the trail, even when various witnesses slandered his character and called him an outright liar. 

The day of the verdict, he clenched the arms of his chair so tightly his knuckles turned white. When the jury announced the unanimous decision that Voltaire and Boris were guilty of all charges, a myriad of emotions flashed over his face. Anger. Fear. Defiance. Hate. Relief. Pain. Guilt. But he rose with the mask in place and faced his seething grandfather as the old man was escorted from the court. 

" I'll make sure you pay for this, Kai. How dare you- "

" Be quiet, old man, " Kai said in a tone colder than ice. " You no longer have power over anyone or anything, least of all me. "

He met Voltaire's livid scowl with a cold glare, and watched the man leave the room emotionlessly, but as soon as the man disappeared, he buried his head in his hands and wept. The emotional scars Voltaire has inflicted on his grandson run deep.

With the trail over and the Individual World Championships in disarray, we returned to Japan for a break. I moved in with Kai in an apartment rented by Mr Dickinson, as I had no where to stay and Kai, understandably, didn't want to live in the Hiwatari mansion. 

Over the weeks we've lived together, I've learnt a lot about Kai, and I've seen the change begin to come over him as he discovers a life he'd never known about. We go to the movies a lot, spend hours in department stores looking at things we'd never dream of buying, eating at restaurants or having coffee in cafes, hang out with Tyson and Max and Kenny, beyblade in the park. He still demands perfection from us, even more so from himself, and he's more than willing to punish us soundly for sloppiness. But somehow, it's lighter than before. There's an undercurrent of amiability in his ruthless attacks and sharp words, and we are stronger as a team because of it. 

Most nights, I cook and we settle down in the lounge together to watch videos or read manga. For some reason, Kai is particularly fascinated with Inu Yasha. I guess because he sees some of himself in the main character – someone who's been alone and angry all his life suddenly finds himself surrounded by people who care for him. 

But there are times when Kai needs some time alone to fight his demons. He's searching for his true self, breaking away ever so slowly from the Kai Hiwatari that Biovolt created. He'll never be completely free – he's been that way for too long to change completely – but he's trying. 

He smiles more these days, and not the cold, smirking type he used to smile. Warm, genuine ones that make his face glow. His eyes have lost their flintiness, and he even laughs in good humor sometimes.

But he only cries in front of me. Only I see how truly vulnerable he is. Beneath that strong exterior, he's confused and frightened, and desperately alone. 

I don't think I'll ever be able to comprehend how horrible life was for him in that abbey. At the trail, he told the court that he'd been sexually abused since he was six, and raped from age 7. The thin, pale scars on his wrists tell how much he hated himself. But somehow he's alive, and I thank the gods for that every moment of the day. Just to be with him, seeing him being an ordinary teenager doing ordinary things, is the greatest gift of my life. 

Yesterday we taught him to play soccer. To think, he'd been forced to grow up so fast he'd never had the opportunity to play soccer. He didn't ask us – he's too proud for that – but he watched with a kind of wistful look on his face as we kicked the ball around the park. So we taught him, and just to see the simple joy light up his whole being as he kicked his first goal brought tears to my eyes. We played until we were exhausted - Takao and Max versus Kai and I – but seeing Kai flushed and happy without a care in the world made it all worth while. His soft ' thank you ' as we walked back to our apartment spoke volumes.

He cried that night, on the balcony when he thought I was asleep, and I ached with longing to wrap my arms around him and kiss his pain away. But I couldn't, because he doesn't need that from me. He needs a friend who will give him unconditional support and time to work things out.

So for now, I'll just have to wait for him as he finds out who he is, and discovers what life has to offer. And I'll be there for him every step of the way. 

Because I love him. 


End file.
